Firsts and Lasts

   As I watch my coworkers and many people I know watch their kids,  babies and their firsts I step back and ponder on how fast time flies by.  While they are watching their firsts with their kids so am I.  In my case I’m watching a lot of things coming in all directions.  Firsts and lasts are happening every day last firsts and last lasts.

    By that meaning for example my son started his first day of his senior year in September.  I was thinking this is his last first day of school.  Today he started his last trimester of his senior year.  It’s his last trimester of school before he graduates.  He will never again have a first day of the start of a new trimester.  He also just finished his last varsity basketball game on home court.  It was his last ever game on an organized team.  On the first game of the season I cried at the thought of his last first game ever.

    It’s funny that when they are little we celebrate the firsts.  We celebrate the first words, the first steps, the first laughs, the first time they ride their bike and so on.  But as they get older such as my situation we are celebrating lasts.  Just like the firsts you are taking lots of pictures and you are taking in every moment.  Sometimes there are tears.  In both cases they are happy and sad tears.  You feel happy and proud but miss the days of the past.  You raise your kids to grow up but sometimes when that begins you are celebrating but it feels sad at the same time.

    Graduation is coming quick and there is going to be many lasts in the months to come.  It’s a reality there will be tears and they will be happy and sad at the same time.  I’m very  proud of all three of my kids and the young people they are becoming.  however I can’t help but think back to all the firsts and wish my little boys back and my little girl back.

    I have come to realize firsts are lasts and lasts are first.  When you do something for the first time you won’t do it again for the first time.  And when a last comes around there will be a first behind it with a new journey.  We will never get these days back and I can’t turn back time.  So I figure I need to take every moment in stride and love it.  Live my life to the fullest every day. No time for the negative.


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